Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Psst....wanna see....?

The infant phenomenon is going to be a handfull.
How do I know?
because my sonograms all start with a view:



...of his bits...
The technician giggled and said.."he's flashing us!'
Of course he is. An exhibitionist. Just like his Mummy.

Friday, August 18, 2006

"Aging Primate???"

Aging Primus...That's the lovely hospital term for first time mummy over 35. At first I thought they were saying aging primate. Which is also true, but seemed unnecessary, somehow.
Yes indeed, I am that primate! Nearly 5 months along!
Don't anyone get their knickers in a bundle, I have told very few people, and I've been waiting for the scary genetic/bad mommy test results to come back, which they have and so far so good. Also I had NO IDEA I was knocked up, around and sideways, until about 3 weeks ago...
Go ahead , laugh.
Are you done?
A: I have been on birth control pills for years. And "skipped" 2 cycles for the AIDS ride and then for a job B: I had NO symptoms (Sorry all you other gals) except for some serious crankiness, and I am at my "chubby" weight. Geez, I thought it was one too many Chipotle Burritos! C: Did I mention how careful I was about Birth Control?
Well it seems like the fertility gods decided to whack me in the rear and get me going whether I like it or not.
I am terrified. Every congratulations, every piece of advice, every new piece of OYVEY maternity wear I acquire fills me with fear and inevitably send me into a crying jag.
Let's not even bring up how T is doing.
You'd think we were both teenagers, instead of the ancient, antique OLD people the OB/Gyn keeps reminding us that we are.
Sigh. Yes I am excited, I think, but at the moment I'm mostly freaked. I have no money, no place to live, really and a very small group of friends most of whom live very far away. Frankly I'm mostly feeling sorry for myself... Please tell me it's the hormones.
The Tyke is going to be cute tho', I hope he's tall and smart like his daddy, and (yes, it's a BOY) I hope he has a good sense of humor, and is more easygoing than EITHER of his parents, and doesn't ever have to worry about food and shelter, and plays the piano, sings and doesn't want to go into show business!

Thursday, August 17, 2006

What the....???? Uh Oh.....

Dear me... How does this sort of thing happen?
Tease...tease...